Okay, so you’d have to be living in some kind of bubble to have not already acknowledged at least a few rom-com lies. I’m not talking about the fact that everyone seems to have endless never-busy friends to run to when things go wrong, or that nobody ever gets stuck without enough money to move out, or even that everyone seems to marry a hot architect – I’m talking about the rom-com lies that teen girls really believe, where some of our favorite stereotypes come from. Just check these beauties out (and play spot the rom-com!).
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1. You’ll Have a Huge House…
This has to be one of the cruelest rom-com lies. Almost everyone in rom-coms seems to live in a huge apartment that is absolutely bathing in light, and has enough room for everyone. More to the point, they’ve got walk-in wardrobes and doormen to carry their shopping bags upstairs or turn away unwanted suitors. All before they are 25, too! Unless you live somewhere super cheap or really out of the way, this just ain’t happening.
2. You Work at a Magazine…
Or a fashion house. Those are the two careers available to women, and no-one defaults from them. All of the magazines will seem the same, too – they are all sister-editions to Cosmo, with that fun atmosphere and plenty of sex articles and high-fashion. In reality, the magazine industry is in decline, and less than 0.5% of Americans work at one. That’s including journals and niche magazines like Railways Today, too.
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3. Yoga is Perfect…
For one-to-one conversations. You don’t go for a relaxing workout, but to have a full-on conversation with a yoga mate. Most of the time, the yoga mate will fully understand what to do and when, despite never going before! In real life, talking during yoga will either result in you collapsing with embarrassment, or getting told off by the teacher. Neither is particularly glamorous.
4. Friends Don’t Have Lives…
Having a bad day? Call your friends. They’ll definitely be home with nothing else to do, and on the odd occasion that they did have something planned, they’ll call to cancel it regardless of how much they wanted to go. Friends exist for you only – if you’re not happy, they are going nowhere.
5. Everybody Cheats…
It seems that almost every rom-com involves someone cheating or almost-cheating on their partner. They usually then go on to realize how much their partner means to them, but seriously, would you really care? And who’d want to either sleep with or be with someone who was a proven cheat? They’ve already shown their hand there, and unless you want to be the person being deceived and hurt, it’s a situation to avoid. Cheating isn’t glamorous, not everyone is doing it, and you shouldn’t put up with it.
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6. Your Friend is Your Prince…
Your best friend of the opposite sex? They are your perfect match. Seriously. Just wait until that inevitable occasion when you’re drunk and you pause just seconds from each other’s lips before deciding to kiss, and your future is sealed. I mean properly sealed – you’ll be married and planning babies within a week. There’s no drunken fumbles, awkwardness and friendship-destroying in rom-com town.
7. You Need to like One Guy Thing…
But not more than one. I mean, this has to be one of the most annoying rom-com lies. Just choose one stereotypical guy thing to like – cars, soccer, basketball, sci-fi, gaming – and you’ll be the sexiest thing ever. You’ll almost certainly attract at least one boyfriend. Don’t try all of those guy things, though – liking more than one puts you firmly in the friend zone.
These aren’t the only rom-com lies that drive me mad. Round here, if you jumped on the stage at a sold-out gig to reveal your undying love for someone, you’d be kicked out faster than the speed of light. You might even get arrested. What rom-com lies rile you up?!
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